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How to Be a Happier, Calmer Parent: 16 Things to Try Instead of Yelling

Gretchen Rubin · 24 Jun 2026 · gretchenrubin.com ↗

2 korrents from this piece

Gretchen Rubin did not write this page.

Every claim below was made in this piece, quoted word for word and numbered in the order the piece makes them, so you can read it there rather than take our word for it. The sentence above each quote is our reading of the claim, not their wording. Each quote was checked against a stored copy of the page at build time; where the two differ, the quote is the fact.

  1. Our reading

    Yelling and nagging at children produces compliance in the moment but costs tension, sulking, and guilt.

    Their wordsYelling and nagging may seem effective in the moment ("I'm getting them to put on their shoes!"), but the cost is tension, sulking, and guilt.

  2. Our reading

    Parental stress and sleep deprivation make harsh reactions to normal child behavior more likely.

    Their wordsWhen a parent is stressed, low on sleep, or otherwise depleted, they may be even more prone to reacting harshly to normal kid behavior and boundary-pushing.