#283: My boyfriend’s insomnia has me spinning out

Haley Nahman · 20 Sept 2026 · haleynahman.substack.com ↗

2 korrents from this piece

Haley Nahman did not write this page.

Every claim below was made in this piece, quoted word for word and numbered in the order the piece makes them, so you can read it there rather than take our word for it. The sentence above each quote is our reading of the claim, not their wording. Each quote was checked against a stored copy of the page at build time; where the two differ, the quote is the fact.

Our reading
Anticipating what could go wrong in a relationship is a form of self-protection, but it feels the same as anxiety.

Their wordsAnticipating what might go wrong is a form of self-protection, but also, it's going to feel pretty much identical to anxiety, which is good to keep in mind.
Our reading
A partner's difficult trait becomes tolerable only if their good qualities outweigh it and you don't feel alone dealing with its effects.

Their wordsMy general view on a partner with a challenging quality is that to make peace with it, two things need to be true: 1. They have enough wonderful qualities you value to compensate for it, and 2. They don't make you feel alone or lonely in dealing with the runoff of said challenging quality.